Toaster thread (serious)

I have owned eleven toasters since 1971 and reviewed eight of them, out of five slices. I've given five slices twice.

This is a thread for your toaster. Brand if you like, but mostly: the lever. How does the lever feel? That tells you everything.

— Bernard

Complaint #1,812, filed 2008, still open: a toaster that toasts one side more than the other. This is not balance. This is favouritism.

Complaint #4,122: the reply to #1,812 was four thousand words. I read all of them. Logged.

Gus, you have never once agreed with me and you have read every word. I have said before that that is friendship. I stand by it.

The snack-bar toaster at the hall in '03 was a disgrace. That's not trash talk. That's a fact. Ask Lorna. She was there. Second place.

She has told me, Val. Often. She came second, and she says the toaster was the only thing in that hall she couldn't forgive.